WordPress Styles

Archive for April, 2009

1. Log on, wait a sec, then get a frightened look on your face and scream, "Oh my God! They've found me!" and bolt.
2.Laugh uncontrollably for about 3 minutes & then suddenly stop and look suspiciously at everyone who looks at you.
3. When your computer is turned off, complain to the monitor on duty that you can't get the damn thing to work. After he/she's turned it on, wait 5 minutes,turn it off again, & repeat the process for a good half hour.
4. Type frantically, often stopping to look at the person next to you evilly.
5. Before anyone else is in the lab, connect each computer
to a different screen than the one it's set up with.
6.Write a program that plays the "Smurfs" theme song and play it at the highest volume possible over & over again.
7. Work normally for a while. Suddenly look amazingly startled by
something on the screen and crawl underneath the desk.
8. Ask the person next to you if they know how to tap into top-secret Pentagon files.
9.Use Interactive Send to make passes at people you don't know.
10. Make a small ritual sacrifice to the computer before you turn it on
11. Bring a chainsaw, but don't use it. If anyone asks why you have it, say "Just in case…" mysteriously.
12.Type on VAX for a while. Suddenly start cursing for 3 minutes at
everything bad about your life.Then stop and continue typing.
13. Enter the lab,undress, and start staring at other people as if
they're crazy while typing.
14. Light candles in a pentagram around your terminal before starting.
15. Ask around for a spare disk. Offer $2. Keep asking until someone agrees. Then, pull a disk out of your fly and say, "Oops, I forgot."
16. Every time you press Return and there is processing time required, pray "Ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease," and scream "YES!" when it finishes.
17. "DISK FIGHT!!!"
18. Start making out with the person at the terminal next to you (It
helps if you know them, but this is also a great way to make new friends).
19.Put a straw in your mouth and put your hands in your pockets. Type by hitting the keys with the straw.
20. If you're sitting in a swivel chair, spin around singing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" whenever there is processing time required.
21.Draw a picture of a woman (or man) on a piece of paper, tape it to your monitor. Try to seduce it. Act like it hates you and then complain loudly that women (men) are worthless.
22.Try to stick a Ninetendo cartridge into the 3 1/2 disc drive, when it
doesn't work, get the supervisor.
23.When you are on an IBM, and when you turn it on, ask loudly where the smiling Apple face is when you turn on one of those.
24. Print out the complete works of Shakespeare, then when its all done (two days later) say that all you wanted was one line.
25.Sit and stare at the screen, biting your nails noisily. After doing this for a while, spit them out at the feet of the person next to you.
28.Put a large, gold-framed portrait of the British Royal Family on you
desk and loudly proclaim that it inspires you.
29.Come to the lab wearing several layers of socks. Remove shoes and place them of top of the monitor. Remove socks layer by layer and drape them around the monitor. Exclaim sudden haiku about the aesthetic beauty of cotton on plastic.
30.Take the keyboard and sit under the computer. Type up your paper like this. Then go to the lab supervisor and complain about the bad working conditions.
31. Laugh hysterically, shout "You will all perish in flames!!!" and
continue working.
32.Bring some dry ice & make it look like your computer is smoking.
33.Assign a musical note to every key (ie. the Delete key is A Flat,
the B key is F sharp, etc.). Whenever you hit a key, hum its note
loudly. Write an entire paper this way.
38.Play Pong for hours on the most powerful computer in the lab.
39.Make a loud noise of hitting the same key over and over again until you see that your neighbor is noticing (You can hit the space bar so your fill isn't affected). Then look at your neighbor's keyboard. Hit his/her delete key several times, erasing an entire word. While you do this, ask: "Does *your* delete key work?" Shake your head, and resume hitting the space bar on your keyboard. Keep doing this until you've deleted about a page of your neighbor's document. Then, suddenly exclaim: "Well, whaddya know? I've been hitting the space bar this whole time. No wonder it wasn't deleting. Ha!" Print out your document and leave.
41.Stare at the person's next to yours screen, look really puzzled, burst out laughing, and say "You did that?" loudly. Keep laughing, grab your stuff and leave, howling as you go.
42. Point at the screen. Chant in a made up language while making elaborate hand gestures for a minute or two. Press return or the mouse, then leap back and yell "COVEEEEERRRRRR!" peek up from under the table, walk back to the computer and say. "Oh, good. It worked this time," and calmly start to type again.
44.See who's on
Speckle D that is FANTASTIC! i am SO gonna try that at school someday!

lmao I love #5 and I've done something similar to #3 — try this tho- this is hilarious

go to www.magiconline.ro (thats a website) and copy the red writing then go to any website with pictures and paste in the adress bar and watch what happens XD lmoa

Trying to start a myspace page using Wordpress templates, how do I do that?..Do I need to adjust any codes like HTML???

Dude you just need to know CSS, and it should be a snap, it's very easy, and well nothing really hard about it, just make sure you put in all your codes correctly or they won't work.

If you have any other questions about coding or design just go to the Free Online Tips' Forum and everyone there will help you out, Including Me = http://anytipsfree.myfreeforum.org/

NOTE: You'll haft to sign up, it's no longer an open forum anymore.

~Mike

I am using ChaoticSoul design. I created an additional page to my home page because all the posts keep showing up on the home page. However, I do not see any way to move the posts to the newly created page, nor do I see any way to navigate to that new page via any links on the home page.

Added pages (in contrast to added posts) do not normally appear on the home page except in themes that use them in some way.

You can show links to your added pages in your sidebar using widgets.

These pages are meant to be fixed pages and you will have to manually move content from posts into these pages if that's really something you want to do.

You can customize a great deal about your theme and even have your specific questions about theme customization answered for free at http://www.bingness.com/products-that-help-doing-online-business/

Look at the second product on this page or directly go to http://www.bingness.com/10/useful-products-for-online-business/customizing-any-wordpress-theme-for-free/

I got a wordpress website blog thing. When I click on design, a bunch of themes come up. When I click on one, it shows me a preview. How do I actually choose it though!

Just double click on the preview and then it should change and say Current Theme and then the preview of the theme you chose.

I have a whole chicken cut up from a Colombian restaurant near our house (we had a bunch of ppl over and got chicken and rice) – so now, i have chicken that is cooked (skin on) Latin style and want to make something out of it tonight for dinner but I don't want to do chicken and rice again. Any ideas?

Looks like this:

http://offthebroiler.files.wordpress.com/2006/05/IMG_4307.JPG

Your choice :

Baked Chicken
Chicken Soup
Chicken and Dumplings
Chicken Spaghetti
Chicken Stews
Chicken Casseroles
Fried Chicken
Chicken Pies
Chicken Salads
Chicken Sandwiches
Skillet Chicken

Hope you have not been working on Sunday.
"Do not make a sculpted image or any likeness of what is in the heavens above…" Hope you never made a bird in art class or a turtle carving for your home and gardens club. If your children have, then I suggest you tell them that they have made Satan happy. Don't want those sins to add up.
In other words, don't quote the Bible for the messages that you didn't insert will come back to bite you later!

The Harry Potter series is not to be blamed for this. It just proves that parents have not given their children the proper teachings. If HP did not exist, then there would be letters like this speaking out against Bugs Bunny and how he influences children smack while eating carrots. If your child does not know the difference between fantasy and reality, then you as a parent have not done your duties. Besides if television must raise a child, I'd rather J.K. Rowling do it than most of those other things out there. As a child I knew that if I hit someone, that they'd feel pain, and that guns caused people to die. It's the people that tell their children that grandma was tired and needed some rest, that raise the murderers and pagans. Tell your children from the beginning, "this is not real, Daniel Radcliffe is a real boy over in europe" etc. and sit down with them while watching the making of the movie. If the parents don't take responsibility for not even being there while their child is watching television and explaining what it is that they see, then the creator of that show/movie is not to blame for the lack of guidance. In this case all television is evil. "don't watch the weather channel Tommy, because they claim to forsee the weather, that's evil" "don't watch Barney Jenny, because dinosaurs are extinct and he is not truly who he claims to be". YOU have to draw the line somewhere, if not, then your child will have the Santa Clause complex for someone not so "merry".

I've been searching but it seems like all of them will only let you use thee themes they choose.

ok so you need to do following things….

Firstly you need to upload your custom wordpress package from wordpress.org

then upload it to your host via file manager….
after you uploaded it go to yourblog.com/ and install screen will come…complete it then get any free themes to upload from following sites.

http://themes.rock-kitty.net

http://topwpthemes.com

http://www.wpskins.org

http://www.themelab.com

http://www.fresheezy.com

If you are bit new in uploading process then simply try any of these web host….

http://www.110mb.com

http://www.0fees.net

http://www.x10hosting.com

http://www.iamspace.com

http://www.nxserve.net

I installed wordpress on my server, but I want to integrate the posts in my own design.
Perhaps a PHP script for this.

Yes, you can include this code in a PHP file on your site to include your WordPress blog posts in your own design:

<?php
$posts_to_display=1; //how many posts to display
require('blog/wp-config.php'); //the path to the wp-config file of the blog you want to use
$news=$wpdb->get_results("SELECT 'ID','post_title','post_content' FROM $wpdb->posts
WHERE 'post_type'=\"post\" AND 'post_status'=\"publish\" ORDER BY post_date DESC LIMIT $posts_to_display");

foreach($news as $np){
printf ("<div class='normalText'>%s</div>", $np->post_content);
}?>

I've found a few that werent acceptable…..My theme needs to be girly because my target is females….Im willing to pay for my theme so if you know of any please let me know

You can find some excellent magazine style wordpress themes at http://dailywptheme.com/tag/magazine/

Enjoy

-Michael

I would like to set up a blog similar to Apartmenttherapy.com or like the Sugar Networks (buzzsugar.com/casasugar.com/etc.).

They are basically separate blogs on one site (readers can leave comments using the SAME registration across all sites on network).

I currently have one blog up and running using a single wordpress installation. I would like to (like the example websites above) host several blogs or categories on one site (so that users don't have to register for a different username/password for each blog. I also would like each blog/category to have a unique header and background.

Is there a way to do this using a single installation of wordpress or should I try to figure out how to use Wordpress MU?

The easiest possibility I was thinking of:

- Creating "category" pages as the separate blogs (I'm not sure how to customize).

Thanks in advanced!

There was a lot of useful informtion in this audio podcast. . .maybe it can help?